Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Healing My Childhood - Hannah's Story

by Hannah




When Felice started doing the meditation webinar, I felt a strong urge to join the class, but I put it off, being too busy with small children, having a husband with a low-paying job, and scraping through with finances. I put the webinar out of my mind for a year or so, until a good friend pestered me to join the class as it was repeating. She kept telling me to e-mail Felice. And so I did (eventually), and I will be grateful forever for that friend and for Felice. Meditation, and knowing how to do it effectively, has changed how I think, and it's still changing me and making me a better me.
When I started my first forty days, my intention was to find myself easily having more patience. I realized that for years, I was instinctively reacting to my children in the same way my mother had reacted to me as a child. Despite my rational belief in gentle, positive parenting, I was still failing. I was lashing out and being angry over things that I felt I ought to have been able to cope with rationally and patiently. By the end of the forty days, I no longer felt the urge to lash out. Not ever. The instinct had been totally driven out of me, to the extent that I am amazed when I look back on the day and how challenging things have been and how calm and patient I have remained. I know it is my practice of Kundalini Yoga and Meditation, working through the Atonement of Christ, that this is possible.
My favorite part of the forty days was the time at home-education camp. I sat in the back of my car with the boot open and chanted Kirtan Kriya to the setting sun in the middle of the Peak District. The experience was beautiful. I remember during one meditation session, as I was chanting I felt the Spirit so strongly. I felt it testify that Jesus had atoned and given His life for us. I knew I was loved and a cherished sister.
I always feel far more positive, energized, and ready to face whatever is in store for me after Felice’s classes. It always feels like there is something there just for me, just what I needed to hear or the exercise my body needed to experience.
After my forty days, I added in a meditation for releasing childhood anger. I can feel it working in me. My face tingles, and I feel my body shedding the incorrect beliefs and the cellular memories it has been holding onto. During a difficult time at the beginning, after much prayer and a lot of tears, I felt the presence of my Heavenly Parents, dressed in white, on either side of me, holding me and letting me know that They loved me. I knew in that moment that I would be okay, that this was something that would pass, and that I could come out stronger when it was finished.

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